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July 2017 Business Meeting

How many clubs get 100% attendance at a meeting – no we didn’t either! But when there’s only eight of you, two people missing, makes for a smaller table, the deaf buggers amongst us being able to hear clearly (pardon?), and we got away a bit earlier – which was a mistake because her indoors wanted to know why I can’t be earlier each month – should have stayed for another shandy!! Still we can forgive our Secretary and Treasurer – a couple of days missing their daughter and they are overjoyed when she returns (strange that – I always used to offer mine money to stay away longer!)

So Wendy took the minutes – we had to keep stopping for her to catch up – I wonder if they will be up to the usual standard – have to do marks out of ten at the next meeting – and fine her for any errors!! And Paul chaired his first meeting after taking over the reins from Rod and thanking him for arranging such a successful changeover lunch!!

He started as he meant to go on by confirming all the new Club Officers – well confirming last years would keep going and letting my arm return from somewhere up my back above the collarbone after I agreed to be First Vice – I like the idea of being first vice, well, I like any vice – I wonder what vice I will have to do?

The Treasurer is obviously trying to earn Brownie points – sending in a posh typed report – no scruffy bit of screwed up scrap! Plenty in our charity funds – actually over £20k too much - well we can’t give it away!! Admin fund is a bit short. Mind you, I think its only because he thinks that by letting us pay our subs at the old rate per head (because we are all too impoverished to pay a couple of quid more each) we will have to raise some money with a social function to balance the books. Well, I was thinking of having a BBQ anyway, so what the hell – 27th August – my shack – being a tight bugger you can all bring your own drinks and meat. And we will raise the balance!! Pay up or be savaged by my tortoise!!

There was bits of chat about other Clubs in the Zone and the events they have held or are holding - everyone has lots on and are being successful – everyone needs help to raise money, just not really enough of us – we desperately need more hands – and Battle Club is more desperate than most!! Why can’t we get new members? Do we smell? Are we zealots? Are we miserable sods? NO! So Wendy’s first project this year is to increase our membership!! How the hell is she going to do it?

Fund raising goes on – taking the China Smash to Hailsham’s Fun Day – I am towing and we think we have enough strength to erect the stall. And we were all chased for the questions for the Children in Need quiz – being a smarmy sort I got mine in last month!! And then Wendy suggested we give stored in it – does she think we are made of money!!

Lyn gave her service and welfare report with aplomb – well it would have been aplomb if us friends had shut up and let her get on with it! That’s friends for you! Salehurst School have been in touch about the whiteboard – why do people want requests but don’t want to put themselves out by a millimetre to receive the money - nothing so queer as folk. And we are still trying to give Public Use Defibrillators to the people of Battle – but where to put them – got to have a drive round, the Council and the NHS aren’t very helpful. And these are the bodies that want service organisations like us to provide these things – its nice to know the other local service organisations can’t give money away either. We are holding back on giving to the Grenfell Tower Disaster Fund – they already have more goods than they can handle and millions to give away which is sitting in the appeal fund bank account. Yes, I am bitter – the money was supposed to go straight to the disposed and helpless!! And I reported on the Battle and Villages Centenary Fund – well I’ve written to all the schools and youth groups, sent articles to the papers – getting nowhere - no publicity, no responses, no requests. Battle must have the richest people and wealthiest youth groups in the country!!!

There was the usual slagging off of the PRO - the club wants articles and correct spelling!! Nothing ever satisfies them!! I like the little wavy green lines that show up under some words – they are almost as pretty as my wife (she’s standing behind me!)!

Then Rod twisted money out of all of us!! John won the raffle – it’s a fix!! And we all went home (after standing chatting in the carpark for ages!!).

We have a really great social life, we give service to the community with only a little bit of effort, we are non-political and all have a great sense of humour – so why not join us? We welcome anybody – the Club even welcomed me!

England and Wales charity no. 1080347
© 2011 Battle & Villages Lions Club

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